A Totally Narcissistic Post

The autumn edition of the Boden catalog came in the mail a few weeks ago.  As I perused the little book filled with colorful and generally very expensive clothing, I noticed that many of the photographs had captions.  Each caption was a question posed to that particular model and her response.  I thought the questions and statements were fun and found myself answering them as well.  Today, I’m going to pretend that I am a Boden model (this will take a significant amount of creative effort) and that the whole world wants to know what I have to say in response to these many deep and thought-provoking questions.  If any questions catch your fancy, send me your answers.  I would love to read them as much as I enjoyed reading the models’ responses.  By the way – and this is completely off topic – I really like the models Boden uses.  Many of them are much closer to my age than the average fashion twig, and  display a very natural beauty that I appreciate.  And now, here they are, the Boden survey of questions, in no particular order.

I’ve always wondered why:  American culture defines beauty so narrowly and unrealistically

I’m no good at but I love doing:  Sudoku puzzles

I wish I could stop: eating potato chips

My life philosophy is:  live for God and the rest will fall into place

I’ll never forget:  the first kiss my husband ever gave me

The moment that changed my life: the birth of my daughter

I wish my man could:  sing like Harry Connick, Jr. or Paul Rodgers from Bad Company

Hopefully I will never learn to:  harbor resentment or bitterness

What scares the pants off me:  current world events

It takes real courage to:  admit I’m wrong and seek forgiveness

What is your latest obsession?  salted caramel hot chocolate from Starbuck’s

When I’m traveling I think about:  God.  No matter where I go, I am forced to recognize His love and creativity – in the natural world and in the people who inhabit it.

What is your greatest unfinished project?  This is a tie – my education OR the first floor remodeling mess that we are enduring at the moment.

Yesterday, I should have:  exercised

Tell us a secret:  Skinny-dipping is the bomb!  (I’ve just totally embarassed my kids)

What was your best catch?  my hubby

What’s in your picnic basket?  potato chips and homemade cookies

What is your favorite fetish?  Now that is a secret.

What makes you cry?  human suffering, especially involving children

What’s under your bed?  Nothing.  I hate clutter and my psyche can’t handle it.  Because clutter is out of control everywhere else in the house right now, my bedroom is my uncluttered sanctuary.

It takes a woman to:  make a man’s life beautiful

When I am angry I:  pray for clarity and self-control

What is your favorite car journey?   Man, this is tough.  I’ve driven the entire Cascade Loop, Route 1 in Califronia and Maine, the Kancamangus Highway in the White Mountains of New Hampshire, and the Skyline Drive in the Shenandoah National Park – all singularly wonderful.  I think my favoritest drive, though, is through the southern river hills or the western and eastern farmlands of Lancaster county.  This place has such a understated, quiet beauty and is very near and dear to my heart.

I always underestimate:  how long it will take me to make myself presentable

I hate making decisions about:  what color to paint the walls

How do you know when you are happy?  I feel relaxed and smiley

What are you totally unrealistsic about?  what I can accomplish in a day

I love being asked:  for my recipes

The best day of my life:  I don’t have a single best day – I’ve had many and anticipate many more.

What advice would you give your 18 year old self:  Love your body and take care of it.  It’s the only one you’ve got and it will never look better than it does right now.

I wish I could stop:  dwelling on things I can’t change

One thing I would like to do this year:  buy a composter

What is your advice on ironing underwear?  People iron underwear?!  What for?  The only person who cares about my underwear would rather I didn’t wear any.

What will you never get credit for?  my intelligence – I’m overshadowed by too many other big brains

Who was your first pet?  (A pet is a who?)  a dachshund named Fritz

How do you make yourself smile?  I think about my kids

Well, there you have it.  My model interview.  I hope you enjoyed answering the questions as much as I did.  Do you think Boden will be giving me a call to model their clothing?  Yeah, I didn’t think so either.